Day four when I made a decision to rip up a cigarette that I found.
On day four, I was talking to a friendly male I was talking to dropped this cigarette on the ground. The man offered me a cigarette. I told him that I quit smoking cigarettes. I took that cigarette off the floor when nobody was looking I took the cigarette I picked up and smashed it on the ground. I was thrilled to have destroyed that cigarette. It made me feel empowered. I looked forward to the sleep study that night, on a Sunday.
I got diagnosed with sleep apnea, a little while back around one month ago.
On day five something horrible happened. I was unable to control my addiction when a friend of mine is a smoker was smoking in front of me. I made the wrong decision to smoke again. It felt good for a time being, and then I felt horribly guilty. I need more alternatives to smoking, like getting a chew stick. Getting help from alternative sources could possibly help quite a bit with this smoking addiction that I have.
On day six I went to buy lose cigarettes. I bought two for a dollar, as the going rate. It’s also an option to buy a pack of cigarettes for $8.50 at that location.
On Day seven, I went to I bought two more lose cigarettes. I’m shaming myself causing me more anxiety as I pick them up and after I smoke them.
On Day eight as in today, I kept smoking my usual five to ten a day.